This is a short one.
Special Editions and Unrated Editions and Director's Cut Editions drive me up the wall.
I just wrote about The Descent and how I don't really like one of the endings. I saw one in the theatre and I saw a different one after I bought the DVD. Silly comedies have UR8TD Versions that have 4 extra seconds of boobs. Uncensored horror films have more gore and usually more boobs. Often times Director's cuts don't have anything to do with the director's vision or anything its just the original cut before a few changes were made to get it the rating they wanted.
This is all well and good. They exist to make more money and I got that. All I want is the option to watch both versions. Thank you Alien Quadrilogy. Thank You for giving me the ability to compare and contrast and having written and video intros to explain what happened and why.
Thank you Van Wilder of all things for giving me the option to choose between the two and having a nice menu change, seriously check it out its brilliant, to differentiate between the two. But that has lead to all of the National Lampoon straight to DVD releases being Unrated as though they were ever rated to begin with, yes they are unrated but come on.
I would like the Lord of the Rings special editions to have that option. I am told in the booklet what is new and what is theatrical but it would be nice to see them back to back in order to compare and contrast. Yes, I am that guy.
The Richard Donner cut of Superman II is cool, because it shows an entire different movie, and is billed as such.
Most Special Editions just have a few extras, the only ones that I am guaranteed to appreciate are the Criterion Collection ones. Good Job Criterion.
Also, Some of those special editions that come in fancy cases and have some kind of souvenir in them are the exact same disc and nothing really special. At least change the graphic on the disc and a little bit of the features, or do you just have a bunch lying around and you want to get rid of them so you repackaged them?
Also, Also, Shout Factory is kind of a cool company.
Monday, January 10, 2011
The Descent of Monster Movies
Part 2 of my Horror Movie breakdown thing.
Monster movies are rough. What constitutes a monster you ask?
That is what the internet has to say. So I am going to go with that.
In regards to monster movies I want to go with the idea that the monster is the central Antagonist, if the monster is the Protagonist it is generally a character piece and isn't really a horror film. This is another good example of how lines get blurred and the genres cross. I mean there are man made monsters, magic monsters, space monsters, and just monsters so again this is hard to really do correctly but I am going to give it a shot.
11. Mimic -
I saw this movie once when I was a kid and it scared me. So it gets honorable mention. Mira Sorvino creates a new kind of cockroach thing to help create a cure for this disease that is killing a bunch of children, then it gets released into the city sewers and evolves like 1000 time faster than expected and starts killing people. It generates limbs that when put together over it's face it looks like a human and its also really tall. This is a good example of a man made monster, science comes back to haunt us and is part of our downfall etc. etc. etc.
10.Tremors -
Campy. Awesome. I love Bacon and this is classic Bacon. There is a good amount of mystery as to what the monsters look like for part of the movie and as to what is going on, I also like that it takes place in a small town. Its really scary to think that you can't touch the ground. Don't get off the bed because the monsters will get you, don't step on the red tiles at the mall because they are lava. Its a base primal fear for some reason.
9. Hammer Films-
I would be remiss if I didn't include these, but I am going to lump them together. I have a problem with Movies that are dated and don't work anymore being anything other than classics. Its hard for me to accept something as the "best of" if I don't enjoy watching it anymore. Also most of them have the Monsters as the main characters not the baddies. Dracula is a little of both but The Wolfman and Frankenstein (Particularly Frankenstein) focus on misunderstood monsters. The Creature movies less so. HOWEVER, they did set the ground work for every monster movie, for better or worse, that followed.
8. Gremlins-
Those little guys were fucking brutal. I mean they really fucked things up. Now I think of this movie primarily as a comedy but it does get scary and its very rare that you get a posse of monsters rather than just one. I think that is what I like. That is why I like Zombies the fact that there is more than one, they can help each other out in wrecking havoc. Gizmo is cute and he helps out too. THere is a nice little romance in there too.
7. It-
This movie is best example of what I hate about Stephen King. He has an idea. It is really scary. There is some human drama in there. And then it turns out to just be some big monster that doesn't have anything to do with anything.
Pennywise = Scary and helped many of my friends believe that clowns are actually scary, this movie made that fear trendy.
Giant Spider that can only be killed with a piece of silver from a sling shot = dumb.
Anyway, Pennywise is definitely a monster and is definitely scary.
6. Brotherhood of the Wolf -
I really like this movie but a lot of people hate on it. It starts great, There is a long mystery of who and or what the monster is, There is a nice gothic classic romantic tone to the whole thing. It is sincerely horrifying at times and drags on just the right amount for suspense to take hold.
5. Slither -
Oh man, This movie shouldn't be as good as it is. If you watch the trailer you assume that it is going to be stupid and a big budget B movie. Here is the thing is it is a low budget A movie. Michael Rooker is awesome and so is Elizabeth Banks. Nathan Fillion is perfect for the leading man, and I don't even care about the dumb space story. There are some truly grotesque moments that pull on heartstrings. Wonderful human interactions and again plays on base and primal fears. Slugs and Slime. People don't like slime. I mean who doesn't flip out when seaweed touches them. HP Lovecraft knew it. The other fear is being possessed by some creature or having something happen to you internally that alters how you look and what you feel. Think about tapeworms, gross.
4. Monsters Inc. -
The monsters are the protagonists. That is easy to overlook because they are also the villains. I like it when new worlds and mythos are created, particularly if they explain something that we already know and except but never explored. Pixar has some wonderful way of making me care, a lot, about all of there characters I am always drawn into their world and feel real danger and excitement for everyone involved.
3. The Host-
Another foreign film on this list. I wonder if that means anything.... Anyway, I didn't really want to see this but went to the theatre with a buddy of mine. Pleasantly surprised. So often what happens nowadays is that directors will use the Jaws format and we will see very little of the creature and then at the end there will be a reveal where we get to see it in its horrifying entirety. The problem is that isn't horrifying. It is either so detailed that we are curious about how it works, or we don't see enough of it and we want to know what it is and how it works, or we haven't been set up for it, or it is bad CGI and we don't believe it exists. The Host somehow does all of these things right. We see a lot of the creature, a lot of it, and maybe that is why it works. We see so much of it that we become desensitized to it and then learn to accept it. Also I like that it is about a family that just wants to be together and be happy. What a good group to fight off a monster.
2. Cloverfield -
This is a gem of a movie. One of the best 100 movies of all time along with #1 on this list. Godzilla and his pals are not on this list because they are not scary, they aren't horror films. Monsters yes, but not really scary. They are just so grandiose that I never get scared. Big wide shots show monsters battling and make them more like brawl movies with a bunch of destruction. And even as a four year old I didn't believe them.
Moving on, see the monster attack from street level, looking up not at. This makes the attack more relatable. We also spend like 20 minutes getting to know the characters intimately, their ins and outs and motivations outside of survival so we feel for them. The monster is just the backdrop for the human psyche under duress and is more of a catalyst than an antagonist. Also small bugs fall off of it and are scary as shit. We don't really get the full story of the attack, it is limited to what a small group of characters experience and that level of intimacy is what makes it horrifying. I love the view from a handheld, if you don't get motion sickness from it don't think of it as a gimmick but a wonderfully executed storytelling device that has only worked here and in Blair Witch.
Also, TJ Miller steals the movie.
1. The Descent -
To reiterate this is one of the greatest movies of all time. The crawlers are the most terrifying creatures to be created in a long time. So close to what humans would be without civilization. You just know that there is no way to stop them, they will keep coming faster and stronger than before. But the brilliant part of this story is that there are two things going on. Yes there are some crazy monsters attacking our heroines but they are also trapped in a cave. Claustrophobia. Everyone suffers from it at some point in time. Especially if it is in a strange place. They even list all of the problems that can occur from spelunking at the beginning. The lighting and camera work are spot on and add an air of uncertainty as to what is going to happen next.
I like how the cast is all ladies. I don't know why. Maybe because gender wars don't come into play and they are all fully capable of handling the situation...well sort of. But seriously who would be. It is brilliant in its simplicity. Characters want to get from point A to point B and there are monsters in their way. True there is some personal shit going down that gets in the way, but i don't really care about any of that. Although it doesn't ruin the movie, it does sort of ruin the ending. The theatrical ending I was here in the US was great. The unrated DVD, and I think the UK release ending is not as good. It is unnecessary and brings up an idea that was never touched throughout the rest of the film. Other than that the movie is perfect, and that is clearly something that is based on the, release money making dvd lost in translation type things that happen today.
Thats it for now.
Monster movies are rough. What constitutes a monster you ask?
1.
a legendary animal combining features of animal and human form or having the forms of various animals in combination, as a centaur, griffin, or sphinx.
2.
any creature so ugly or monstrous as to frighten people.
3.
any animal or human grotesquely deviating from the normal shape, behavior, or character.
4.
a person who excites horror by wickedness, cruelty, etc.
5.
any animal or thing huge in size.
6.
Biology.
a.
an animal or plant of abnormal form or structure, as from marked malformation or the absence of certain parts or organs.
b.
a grossly anomalous fetus or infant, esp. one that is not viable.
7.
anything unnatural or monstrous.
That is what the internet has to say. So I am going to go with that.
In regards to monster movies I want to go with the idea that the monster is the central Antagonist, if the monster is the Protagonist it is generally a character piece and isn't really a horror film. This is another good example of how lines get blurred and the genres cross. I mean there are man made monsters, magic monsters, space monsters, and just monsters so again this is hard to really do correctly but I am going to give it a shot.
11. Mimic -
I saw this movie once when I was a kid and it scared me. So it gets honorable mention. Mira Sorvino creates a new kind of cockroach thing to help create a cure for this disease that is killing a bunch of children, then it gets released into the city sewers and evolves like 1000 time faster than expected and starts killing people. It generates limbs that when put together over it's face it looks like a human and its also really tall. This is a good example of a man made monster, science comes back to haunt us and is part of our downfall etc. etc. etc.
10.Tremors -
Campy. Awesome. I love Bacon and this is classic Bacon. There is a good amount of mystery as to what the monsters look like for part of the movie and as to what is going on, I also like that it takes place in a small town. Its really scary to think that you can't touch the ground. Don't get off the bed because the monsters will get you, don't step on the red tiles at the mall because they are lava. Its a base primal fear for some reason.
9. Hammer Films-
I would be remiss if I didn't include these, but I am going to lump them together. I have a problem with Movies that are dated and don't work anymore being anything other than classics. Its hard for me to accept something as the "best of" if I don't enjoy watching it anymore. Also most of them have the Monsters as the main characters not the baddies. Dracula is a little of both but The Wolfman and Frankenstein (Particularly Frankenstein) focus on misunderstood monsters. The Creature movies less so. HOWEVER, they did set the ground work for every monster movie, for better or worse, that followed.
8. Gremlins-
Those little guys were fucking brutal. I mean they really fucked things up. Now I think of this movie primarily as a comedy but it does get scary and its very rare that you get a posse of monsters rather than just one. I think that is what I like. That is why I like Zombies the fact that there is more than one, they can help each other out in wrecking havoc. Gizmo is cute and he helps out too. THere is a nice little romance in there too.
7. It-
This movie is best example of what I hate about Stephen King. He has an idea. It is really scary. There is some human drama in there. And then it turns out to just be some big monster that doesn't have anything to do with anything.
Pennywise = Scary and helped many of my friends believe that clowns are actually scary, this movie made that fear trendy.
Giant Spider that can only be killed with a piece of silver from a sling shot = dumb.
Anyway, Pennywise is definitely a monster and is definitely scary.
6. Brotherhood of the Wolf -
I really like this movie but a lot of people hate on it. It starts great, There is a long mystery of who and or what the monster is, There is a nice gothic classic romantic tone to the whole thing. It is sincerely horrifying at times and drags on just the right amount for suspense to take hold.
5. Slither -
Oh man, This movie shouldn't be as good as it is. If you watch the trailer you assume that it is going to be stupid and a big budget B movie. Here is the thing is it is a low budget A movie. Michael Rooker is awesome and so is Elizabeth Banks. Nathan Fillion is perfect for the leading man, and I don't even care about the dumb space story. There are some truly grotesque moments that pull on heartstrings. Wonderful human interactions and again plays on base and primal fears. Slugs and Slime. People don't like slime. I mean who doesn't flip out when seaweed touches them. HP Lovecraft knew it. The other fear is being possessed by some creature or having something happen to you internally that alters how you look and what you feel. Think about tapeworms, gross.
4. Monsters Inc. -
The monsters are the protagonists. That is easy to overlook because they are also the villains. I like it when new worlds and mythos are created, particularly if they explain something that we already know and except but never explored. Pixar has some wonderful way of making me care, a lot, about all of there characters I am always drawn into their world and feel real danger and excitement for everyone involved.
3. The Host-
Another foreign film on this list. I wonder if that means anything.... Anyway, I didn't really want to see this but went to the theatre with a buddy of mine. Pleasantly surprised. So often what happens nowadays is that directors will use the Jaws format and we will see very little of the creature and then at the end there will be a reveal where we get to see it in its horrifying entirety. The problem is that isn't horrifying. It is either so detailed that we are curious about how it works, or we don't see enough of it and we want to know what it is and how it works, or we haven't been set up for it, or it is bad CGI and we don't believe it exists. The Host somehow does all of these things right. We see a lot of the creature, a lot of it, and maybe that is why it works. We see so much of it that we become desensitized to it and then learn to accept it. Also I like that it is about a family that just wants to be together and be happy. What a good group to fight off a monster.
2. Cloverfield -
This is a gem of a movie. One of the best 100 movies of all time along with #1 on this list. Godzilla and his pals are not on this list because they are not scary, they aren't horror films. Monsters yes, but not really scary. They are just so grandiose that I never get scared. Big wide shots show monsters battling and make them more like brawl movies with a bunch of destruction. And even as a four year old I didn't believe them.
Moving on, see the monster attack from street level, looking up not at. This makes the attack more relatable. We also spend like 20 minutes getting to know the characters intimately, their ins and outs and motivations outside of survival so we feel for them. The monster is just the backdrop for the human psyche under duress and is more of a catalyst than an antagonist. Also small bugs fall off of it and are scary as shit. We don't really get the full story of the attack, it is limited to what a small group of characters experience and that level of intimacy is what makes it horrifying. I love the view from a handheld, if you don't get motion sickness from it don't think of it as a gimmick but a wonderfully executed storytelling device that has only worked here and in Blair Witch.
Also, TJ Miller steals the movie.
1. The Descent -
To reiterate this is one of the greatest movies of all time. The crawlers are the most terrifying creatures to be created in a long time. So close to what humans would be without civilization. You just know that there is no way to stop them, they will keep coming faster and stronger than before. But the brilliant part of this story is that there are two things going on. Yes there are some crazy monsters attacking our heroines but they are also trapped in a cave. Claustrophobia. Everyone suffers from it at some point in time. Especially if it is in a strange place. They even list all of the problems that can occur from spelunking at the beginning. The lighting and camera work are spot on and add an air of uncertainty as to what is going to happen next.
I like how the cast is all ladies. I don't know why. Maybe because gender wars don't come into play and they are all fully capable of handling the situation...well sort of. But seriously who would be. It is brilliant in its simplicity. Characters want to get from point A to point B and there are monsters in their way. True there is some personal shit going down that gets in the way, but i don't really care about any of that. Although it doesn't ruin the movie, it does sort of ruin the ending. The theatrical ending I was here in the US was great. The unrated DVD, and I think the UK release ending is not as good. It is unnecessary and brings up an idea that was never touched throughout the rest of the film. Other than that the movie is perfect, and that is clearly something that is based on the, release money making dvd lost in translation type things that happen today.
Thats it for now.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Auto Tune vs. The Loss of Magic
Hello Internet,
When is enough enough? Are we at the point where we celebrate and idolize people that cannot do their job without the help of a computer? Did Frank Sinatra have auto tune or did he just sing well? and by well I mean awesome. Did Steve McQueen hire twelve stuntmen to ride a motorcycle for him. Did Charlie Chaplin employ 32 computer engineers to change his facial expressions because they weren't spot on or did he just do another take? Did Picasso use photoshop? Did Mozart use garageband?
Tom Cruise insists that he does as many of his own stunts as possible. Julie Taymor has hired at least 15 stuntmen to play Spiderman on Broadway and collect workman's comp. James Cameron created technology to help change actor's faces incase they didn't get it right on the first try. Heaven forbid that you should have to do another take in front of a green screen. Remember when directors would wait a month for the sun to set in between mountains for a good shot? Remember when a whole album would get released rather than a 99 cent single?
Remember when singers would sing a song correctly rather than Milli Vanilli the whole thing? Ever hear that Britney Spears track of her live without the computer assistance? What does Riahanna's voice sound like? Didn't rap used to be cool and not a bullshit pop phenomenon? Why do we hold people in such high regard when they can't do what they are paid millions of dollars to do. Keanu Reeves actually learned Kung Fu for The Matrix. Its like he cares about acting more than being a star. The cast of That Thing You Do learned their instruments. Mark Wahlberg wasn't actually singing in Rockstar. Zemeckis, one of the greatest directors of all time has given up on actors and works on motion capture rather than dealing with makeup and creative solutions. Peter Jackson created real things in LOTR. Actual lines of sight and classic camera tricks alongside the CGI.
George Lucas used to use models for his spaceships, now they look like they belong in The Simpsons. Spielberg ruined Indy with too much CGI. I liked the gopher gag but it was ruined because I didn't believe it. Will Friedkin built a freezer so that breath could be seen in The Exorcist. Now we just digitally add it because heaven forbid someone should be cold.
Auto Tune is the scapegoat I have decided to use for the masses creating false celebrities who have no real tangible talent. Reality TV is another good example of that kind of bullshit, but we all know that they are attention whores anyway. The "professionals" that can't do what they should be able to do and have become lazy are really who are to blame. Theatre used to be an escape, everything you saw was real and actual. Now Taymor ha started the new movement of creating an illusion and ruining the magic.
When is enough enough? Are we at the point where we celebrate and idolize people that cannot do their job without the help of a computer? Did Frank Sinatra have auto tune or did he just sing well? and by well I mean awesome. Did Steve McQueen hire twelve stuntmen to ride a motorcycle for him. Did Charlie Chaplin employ 32 computer engineers to change his facial expressions because they weren't spot on or did he just do another take? Did Picasso use photoshop? Did Mozart use garageband?
Tom Cruise insists that he does as many of his own stunts as possible. Julie Taymor has hired at least 15 stuntmen to play Spiderman on Broadway and collect workman's comp. James Cameron created technology to help change actor's faces incase they didn't get it right on the first try. Heaven forbid that you should have to do another take in front of a green screen. Remember when directors would wait a month for the sun to set in between mountains for a good shot? Remember when a whole album would get released rather than a 99 cent single?
Remember when singers would sing a song correctly rather than Milli Vanilli the whole thing? Ever hear that Britney Spears track of her live without the computer assistance? What does Riahanna's voice sound like? Didn't rap used to be cool and not a bullshit pop phenomenon? Why do we hold people in such high regard when they can't do what they are paid millions of dollars to do. Keanu Reeves actually learned Kung Fu for The Matrix. Its like he cares about acting more than being a star. The cast of That Thing You Do learned their instruments. Mark Wahlberg wasn't actually singing in Rockstar. Zemeckis, one of the greatest directors of all time has given up on actors and works on motion capture rather than dealing with makeup and creative solutions. Peter Jackson created real things in LOTR. Actual lines of sight and classic camera tricks alongside the CGI.
George Lucas used to use models for his spaceships, now they look like they belong in The Simpsons. Spielberg ruined Indy with too much CGI. I liked the gopher gag but it was ruined because I didn't believe it. Will Friedkin built a freezer so that breath could be seen in The Exorcist. Now we just digitally add it because heaven forbid someone should be cold.
Auto Tune is the scapegoat I have decided to use for the masses creating false celebrities who have no real tangible talent. Reality TV is another good example of that kind of bullshit, but we all know that they are attention whores anyway. The "professionals" that can't do what they should be able to do and have become lazy are really who are to blame. Theatre used to be an escape, everything you saw was real and actual. Now Taymor ha started the new movement of creating an illusion and ruining the magic.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Christmas Movies
My favorite Christmas Movies:
1. Die Hard
Takes place at Christmas, ends happy, and shit explodes.
2. White Christmas
I watched it when I was a kid, it is classy, there is a bunch of Christmas cheer and hilarity. Also the leads are really good.
3. The Ref
Everyone is spot on with their characters and its a really creative script. The dark side of the Holidays.
4. Bad Santa
I pissed myself watching this. Also there is an asprin and candy corn in an advent calender.
5. Home Alone
Anyone who does not think this movie is awesome is dumb. It exemplifies the true meaning of Christmas believe it or not.
6. A Charlie Brown Christmas
The soundtrack has become iconic and is actually about Christmas rather than just taking place at Christmas.
7. A Christmas Carol
George C Scott's and the Muppets tie.
8. The Santa Clause
This movie is really good. I love Tim Allen so I might be biased but it adds some comedic science to the physics related problems of St. Nick.
9. Joyeux Noel
The WWI Christmas truce for some reason makes me have faith in mankind and that is what this is about.
10. Lethal Weapon
See Die Hard.
11. Christmas Vacation
Much better than when they go to Europe and Randy Quaid kills it.
12. Love Actually
Rowan Atkinson wraps a present. Thats good enough for me.
1. Die Hard
Takes place at Christmas, ends happy, and shit explodes.
2. White Christmas
I watched it when I was a kid, it is classy, there is a bunch of Christmas cheer and hilarity. Also the leads are really good.
3. The Ref
Everyone is spot on with their characters and its a really creative script. The dark side of the Holidays.
4. Bad Santa
I pissed myself watching this. Also there is an asprin and candy corn in an advent calender.
5. Home Alone
Anyone who does not think this movie is awesome is dumb. It exemplifies the true meaning of Christmas believe it or not.
6. A Charlie Brown Christmas
The soundtrack has become iconic and is actually about Christmas rather than just taking place at Christmas.
7. A Christmas Carol
George C Scott's and the Muppets tie.
8. The Santa Clause
This movie is really good. I love Tim Allen so I might be biased but it adds some comedic science to the physics related problems of St. Nick.
9. Joyeux Noel
The WWI Christmas truce for some reason makes me have faith in mankind and that is what this is about.
10. Lethal Weapon
See Die Hard.
11. Christmas Vacation
Much better than when they go to Europe and Randy Quaid kills it.
12. Love Actually
Rowan Atkinson wraps a present. Thats good enough for me.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Netflix
Ladies and Gentlemen of the internet Netflix is the greatest thing you could pay 10 dollars for. I feel like an idiot for not buying stock sooner.
I get a huge collection of movies, obscure ones that I can't get at the store, I don't have to worry about it, its not an issue to get a replacement when something is scratched, it is a more personal experience than going to a store and talking to a person. Weird I know.
I am going to assume that everyone is already a member and not tray and sell anyone on it.
Here are my problems with Netflix:
1. When I say I am not interested in a movie it doesn't go away, it stays there and is continually suggested to me. When I say I am not interested then I don't want to see it again. But it would be nice if there was a tab for those movies I am no longer interested in to go through and see if perhaps I changed my mind.
1 1/2: I would like a tab that will list all movies I have already rated in sections from 5-1 stars just in case I want to see something again. Because a movie I already rated shouldn't be suggested to me. Instant has this to a degree but it should be universal.
2: Bring the Netlfix Friends back. It was cool.
3. Instant needs more titles, they know this and are working on it.
4: Writers and Producers should be searchable. I happen to want to see everything that Mamet wrote but don't want to have to go to IMDB and then back to Netflix to see what that might be.
5. I would like to know what everyone else rated a movie, not just what Netflix might think I would rate it. Both is what I am looking for.
6. Basic vs. Advanced or Generic vs. More Information in regards to summary and cast. I want to be able to have the information, at least to a certain degree that IMDB has about the movies I rate on Netflix.
7. Why are some movies no longer available?
8. More movies per search page.
9. I could also go with a type of movie option or keyword search, i.e. Christmas Movies, movies that involve apes, good soundtracks, movies about writers etc.
We are getting a little particular about shit now but seriously, these would be some good adjustments.
Also I am willing to work as a consultant for your company Netflix.
I get a huge collection of movies, obscure ones that I can't get at the store, I don't have to worry about it, its not an issue to get a replacement when something is scratched, it is a more personal experience than going to a store and talking to a person. Weird I know.
I am going to assume that everyone is already a member and not tray and sell anyone on it.
Here are my problems with Netflix:
1. When I say I am not interested in a movie it doesn't go away, it stays there and is continually suggested to me. When I say I am not interested then I don't want to see it again. But it would be nice if there was a tab for those movies I am no longer interested in to go through and see if perhaps I changed my mind.
1 1/2: I would like a tab that will list all movies I have already rated in sections from 5-1 stars just in case I want to see something again. Because a movie I already rated shouldn't be suggested to me. Instant has this to a degree but it should be universal.
2: Bring the Netlfix Friends back. It was cool.
3. Instant needs more titles, they know this and are working on it.
4: Writers and Producers should be searchable. I happen to want to see everything that Mamet wrote but don't want to have to go to IMDB and then back to Netflix to see what that might be.
5. I would like to know what everyone else rated a movie, not just what Netflix might think I would rate it. Both is what I am looking for.
6. Basic vs. Advanced or Generic vs. More Information in regards to summary and cast. I want to be able to have the information, at least to a certain degree that IMDB has about the movies I rate on Netflix.
7. Why are some movies no longer available?
8. More movies per search page.
9. I could also go with a type of movie option or keyword search, i.e. Christmas Movies, movies that involve apes, good soundtracks, movies about writers etc.
We are getting a little particular about shit now but seriously, these would be some good adjustments.
Also I am willing to work as a consultant for your company Netflix.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thanksgiving
Is Thanksgiving my favorite holiday? No. But I hate what it has become. A gateway drug for Christmas. Do I hate Christmas? No. But it is possible to overload on it. It is the only thing anyone can think about for months. I walked into a Duane Reade on Halloween day, 2:00 pm, They were stocking the shelves with Christmas everything. I simply want a holiday to finish. Thanksgiving is about being thankful for everything you have, and it just so happens that most of those things are food, football, and booze. Three of my favorite things. But that, combined with Black Friday seems to be all that is about.
Have a happy Turkey Day. No, It's not turkey day, what about vegetarians? Happy Gobble Gobble Day. Holy Crap. And now I heard simply, Happy Gobble Gobble.
Rather than give into our gluttony, lets be thankful that small pox has been eradicated.
Be patient Christmas will last a whole month. And it can live in your heart all year long.
Also, to a certain degree Coca-Cola invented Santa Claus to sell more product. The Holiday season seems to be about consumerism. Which is fine, but I wish it was more subtle.
Have a happy Turkey Day. No, It's not turkey day, what about vegetarians? Happy Gobble Gobble Day. Holy Crap. And now I heard simply, Happy Gobble Gobble.
Rather than give into our gluttony, lets be thankful that small pox has been eradicated.
Be patient Christmas will last a whole month. And it can live in your heart all year long.
Also, to a certain degree Coca-Cola invented Santa Claus to sell more product. The Holiday season seems to be about consumerism. Which is fine, but I wish it was more subtle.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Alien Vs.
Science Fiction, Sci Fi, Skiffy, SyFy, SF. What a strange genre to define. As far as I am concerned anything with a technical explanation of anything, which is based in what we know so far about science, and is not a true story, is SciFi. Jurassic Park, Inception, Star Wars, Star Trek, Contact, Modern Times, CSI, all SciFi because they have science in them and are fiction. Easy right? Well if thats the case this list could go on and on. Lets just agree that for our purposes we will be talking about stuff in or from space and try to avoid nitpicky overlaps as much as possible. I only want to examine movies that are actually scary and fall under Horror. Just because there are scary moments in ID4 and Empire doesn't mean that they are horror films.
I have compiled a list of movies that will compete with the movie Alien. If I remember correctly it is considered to be one of the scariest movies of all time, whether in space or not. I agree, and it will be the touchstone against all the other ones. That being said, it seems to me that the best ones happen in space, on a spaceship and not with aliens landing on earth. So here is a list of movies that didn't make the full cut for me to talk about but fall into the genre.
Critters - Stupid.
Cube - Fun when on tv late night, and truly creepy, sometimes, but the sequels are crap and it doesn't have anything to do with space.
Bad Taste - Just not that good.
Xfiles - come on, way too much happens in that show for it to be lumped into another group.
War of the Worlds (either or) - just not really a horror film so much as a survival disaster type thing.
Invasion of the Body Snatchers - The pods didn't have to be from space, they could have just been from the amazon or something.
Predator - Action Movie with a monster. Not a horror movie.
CloverField - we are going to file this under Monster Movie and talk about it later.
Pitch Black - Action Horror but still awesome.
Ok so here we go Lets see what stacks up against Ridley Scott's Alien.
ALIEN VS. THE OTHER ALIEN FILMS:
Alien, Aliens, Alien3, Alien Resurrection. In that order are the best to the least. Alien Resurrection is not a bad movie. Its simply the worst of the for and also the worst of Jeunut's as well, But still better than most other movies out there. But its more of an action horror, and I think action trumps horror.
Ironically this knocks out Aliens as well. But it is without a doubt the single scariest action movie of all time. Two reasons it upped the ante of the first movie and played off of the mythos in a great way. But more importantly, motion detectors. The radar that is used to sense movement acts as a soundtrack for the movie, replacing the need for scary violins. We as the audience can become immersed in the fear with the marines and for whatever reason James Cameron chose the exact right sound and volume for it. The face huggers are more prevalent and they are fucking creepy. I am doubting my decision to cut it out of the running but, I am going to stick with it. Aliens is superb just not so much a pure horror film.
Which leaves use with Alien3. I like Alien3. Lots of people hate on it. What I think is important to remember is that there were a lot of issues with the studio and delays with script that put a lot of wrenches in a lot of gears. It went back to the idea of a single Xenomorph stalking its prey. Some crazy prison monks who haven't seen a woman in years, no weapons, no power and a few idiots plus lots of vents equal some scary scenes. Its really good and I wish that Fincher was allowed to make the movie he wanted. The technology for the effects wasn't up to snuff and over time it has suffered because of it. It is also more chest pounding anxiety of what is coming than fear. So Alien wins.
So lets talk about Alien for a little while. Gothic horror film in space. Thats what it is. What is particularly interesting in many horror films but more so it seems in space is the idea of isolation and fear of the unknown. Lets all go to a deserted cabin, or into the desert, or in a small town. Well in all of those situations you have to just walk a little ways and you can reach civilization. In space you can't just leave the ship. You have to wait for it to travel a few light years before you can disembark. Isolation, blackness, and the unknown could be the three scariest things in the world. Imagine waking up after sleeping for a few decades and then seeing nothing but darkness around you while discovering you are not where you are supposed to be. People get scared in their own homes when its dark all the time. Kurt Vonnegut wrote a great short story about being in space for the first time called "Thanasphere." It scared the crap out of me when I was 14.
Now add a giant fucking monster. H.R. Gieger did a great job of creating the thing, and the producers did an even better job of realizing that they should get him to make it in the first place. The lack of eyes and streamlined head and body is what does it. Anything that can see you without eyes is creepy.
Now through in some small confined air vents that it can move around in so it can be anywhere and if you go in there, you can't move or see. There is even less of a place to go.
Ridley hired some of the best actors around to be in his movie and it shows. It is a wonderful piece of acting and has some great dialogue. Everyone seems as though they have been on the road for years and are tired of one another. Relationships are informed and executed. Everyone seems to like Hurt as well which makes it even worse when his chest explodes. Also, and this is going to be rough, imagine never having seen Spaceballs, or simply not knowing that eventually someone was going to have an alien come out of them. Thats always hard with classic movies, you hear about them and things are ruined. It makes me want to show it to my kids at an early age so they can experience it for the first time like they should but then my kids would be scarred and start to look like the boy from The Ring and they would be all fucked up. SO I will just have to hope that they don't hear about it before they get to see it.
Dan O'Bannon said that his inspiration for the face huggers was that he wanted to scare the men in the audience. With that in mind he decided that the scariest thing for a man was Oral Rape. His words. The face hugger looks a little bit like a vagina on the bottom side as well and the body looks like a set of hands that are choking and suffocating you. And they scamper. Scampering is always scary. Why I don't know, but I think because only small things scamper and small things are are to catch. They are also generally more likely to pierce our skin than simply bludgeon us. No one likes it when their skin has a needle in it, well almost no one.
No one had ever seen anything like the xenomorph and there isn't anything else like it. Even if you kill it chances are it will bleed on you and your face will melt off. All of these are things that are things we don't like, but during this movie we are experiencing them indirectly, through a filter. We don't see someone choking a victim, but we do see hands around a neck.
After all of that imagine that your doctor tries to shove a magazine down your throat and then bleeds milk and marbles.
EVENT HORIZON
Not that great of a movie. It seems almost that the only reason its scary is because it is supposed to be. Too much of the fear is on the surface in special effects and set design and gore. All of it is shock value, which is cheap. I'm not really afraid of hell. I don't want to go there but, it is such a sensory overload that my mind shuts down and tells me it isn't real. Sensory overload is a good way to describe it. Hostel is the same way but there is always a spotlight on what we should focus on, a real tangible horrific act. I don't have anything in my life to relate to Event Horizon's version of Bosch's Hell. ALien keeps thigns in the shadows, doesn't show its hand until we have built up to it. It is a slow churning in the gut rather than a blinding light burning the eyes. Also the acting isn't very good, because there aren't really any well written scenes. Its hard to act well when there is a bad script. Something special has to happen in order for it to be overcome.
And Joely Richardson is the worst. (quick side note just in case you don't believe it, watch her eat something on screen, in Nip/Tuck she eats a piece of steak and a piece of banana bread, she tries way too hard)
2001:A SPACE ODYSSEY / SUNSHINE / MOON
These are interesting because they aren't really horror films, but are still scary. Moon less so. It is a brilliant movie with a huge fear of the unknown and sense of isolation. I also believe it, in terms of it being possible. There is always an impending fear of what is coming, what is going to happen next. And that sense is hard to get so it deserves some mention.
Sunshine is proof that Danny Boyle can direct anything. Space, Zombies, Druggies, Coming of age Journey, A childrens film, Love story. Its nuts. Sunshine turns into a horror film after having been a survival drama. There are tense moments of basic ship repairs and standard space snafus but walking into an abandoned ship covered in dust because, dust is mainly human skin. Reading that in the script is crazy to think about, but Boyle saw it as an opportunity to raise tension and apprehension of what comes next. A man driven crazy by the sun. Literally. After having spliced in some headshots of the ex-crew, ala Friedkin, we finally see what became of them, and a manhunt begins. All while trying to save the world. His tempo and use of angles in his shots as well as light and shadow is eerie. I just wish he had used the focus a little more sometimes towards the end. Also I don't understand why a scalpel would need to vibrate.
2001:A Space Odyssey. See The Shining. Now Imagine that Jack Nicholson was a computer. A computer who is in charge of everything and can control everything around you. Every movie in space owes a lot to Kubrick. Slow steady build in a cold sterile environment. It is a big investment to sit down and watch and might be better without the vague beginning and end. Once you know what is going on it makes sense but the story telling of something based in science should be a tad clearer.
All three of these are great films and have some major horror elements to them but they just don't have enough to beat monsters.
PANDORUM
The trailer and the poster for this film were good and lead to me to approach it in a certain way. The first 20 to 30 minutes of it held up to that agreement. You will put me on a spaceship and weird creepy shti will happen and it will be scary. Ben Foster wakes up from hyper sleep, for his four year shift of running the ship. His body as shrunk and skin has died, he literally no longer fits in his skin and has to shed. Tubes and cables are going in and out of him, he finds another survivor they have no memory and have to figure it out. Then there are some weird noises. It is creepy. Tight spaces, at one point it looks like he will be stuck in a duct forever when he finally gets out it looks like the ship is giving birth to him. At this point The pacing was perfect the suspense was right where it should have been, I knew a reveal was coming up and was all ready to sit back and enjoy the modern day Alien.
That is when everything got stupid. Post apocalyptic tribal mutant cannibals start attacking. Some French Samoan is awesome at Jedi Gymnastics and some Milla Jovovich wannabe is there to. Some convoluted flashbacks and a silly twist happen after they find the reason for the mutation and then something cool happens. Sincerely, its cool. Remember that these guys were floating adrift unsure of where they were, yada yada, generic space plot? They were underwater the whole time. In looking out the window it looked dark because it was deep. They had already reached their destination and were just sitting in the water thinking that Will Robinson is in danger.It was an interesting way to guarantee a happy ending and add to the notion that it is scary not to know where you are even if it is where you are supposed to be.
THE THING
Not in space, but is Isolated and has an Alien. Normally I would say this is a monster movie but the isolation and the simple fact that you don't ever know who might kill you trumps it. Kurt Russell is the shit, always. Its a simple plot, but something about it, i think its unpredictability again, is scary. This monster never looks the same so you never know what part of it might have a mouth to eat you. There is no escape in the antarctic, and rather than black everywhere its white. I don't have much else to say about that.
I have compiled a list of movies that will compete with the movie Alien. If I remember correctly it is considered to be one of the scariest movies of all time, whether in space or not. I agree, and it will be the touchstone against all the other ones. That being said, it seems to me that the best ones happen in space, on a spaceship and not with aliens landing on earth. So here is a list of movies that didn't make the full cut for me to talk about but fall into the genre.
Critters - Stupid.
Cube - Fun when on tv late night, and truly creepy, sometimes, but the sequels are crap and it doesn't have anything to do with space.
Bad Taste - Just not that good.
Xfiles - come on, way too much happens in that show for it to be lumped into another group.
War of the Worlds (either or) - just not really a horror film so much as a survival disaster type thing.
Invasion of the Body Snatchers - The pods didn't have to be from space, they could have just been from the amazon or something.
Predator - Action Movie with a monster. Not a horror movie.
CloverField - we are going to file this under Monster Movie and talk about it later.
Pitch Black - Action Horror but still awesome.
Ok so here we go Lets see what stacks up against Ridley Scott's Alien.
ALIEN VS. THE OTHER ALIEN FILMS:
Alien, Aliens, Alien3, Alien Resurrection. In that order are the best to the least. Alien Resurrection is not a bad movie. Its simply the worst of the for and also the worst of Jeunut's as well, But still better than most other movies out there. But its more of an action horror, and I think action trumps horror.
Ironically this knocks out Aliens as well. But it is without a doubt the single scariest action movie of all time. Two reasons it upped the ante of the first movie and played off of the mythos in a great way. But more importantly, motion detectors. The radar that is used to sense movement acts as a soundtrack for the movie, replacing the need for scary violins. We as the audience can become immersed in the fear with the marines and for whatever reason James Cameron chose the exact right sound and volume for it. The face huggers are more prevalent and they are fucking creepy. I am doubting my decision to cut it out of the running but, I am going to stick with it. Aliens is superb just not so much a pure horror film.
Which leaves use with Alien3. I like Alien3. Lots of people hate on it. What I think is important to remember is that there were a lot of issues with the studio and delays with script that put a lot of wrenches in a lot of gears. It went back to the idea of a single Xenomorph stalking its prey. Some crazy prison monks who haven't seen a woman in years, no weapons, no power and a few idiots plus lots of vents equal some scary scenes. Its really good and I wish that Fincher was allowed to make the movie he wanted. The technology for the effects wasn't up to snuff and over time it has suffered because of it. It is also more chest pounding anxiety of what is coming than fear. So Alien wins.
So lets talk about Alien for a little while. Gothic horror film in space. Thats what it is. What is particularly interesting in many horror films but more so it seems in space is the idea of isolation and fear of the unknown. Lets all go to a deserted cabin, or into the desert, or in a small town. Well in all of those situations you have to just walk a little ways and you can reach civilization. In space you can't just leave the ship. You have to wait for it to travel a few light years before you can disembark. Isolation, blackness, and the unknown could be the three scariest things in the world. Imagine waking up after sleeping for a few decades and then seeing nothing but darkness around you while discovering you are not where you are supposed to be. People get scared in their own homes when its dark all the time. Kurt Vonnegut wrote a great short story about being in space for the first time called "Thanasphere." It scared the crap out of me when I was 14.
Now add a giant fucking monster. H.R. Gieger did a great job of creating the thing, and the producers did an even better job of realizing that they should get him to make it in the first place. The lack of eyes and streamlined head and body is what does it. Anything that can see you without eyes is creepy.
Now through in some small confined air vents that it can move around in so it can be anywhere and if you go in there, you can't move or see. There is even less of a place to go.
Ridley hired some of the best actors around to be in his movie and it shows. It is a wonderful piece of acting and has some great dialogue. Everyone seems as though they have been on the road for years and are tired of one another. Relationships are informed and executed. Everyone seems to like Hurt as well which makes it even worse when his chest explodes. Also, and this is going to be rough, imagine never having seen Spaceballs, or simply not knowing that eventually someone was going to have an alien come out of them. Thats always hard with classic movies, you hear about them and things are ruined. It makes me want to show it to my kids at an early age so they can experience it for the first time like they should but then my kids would be scarred and start to look like the boy from The Ring and they would be all fucked up. SO I will just have to hope that they don't hear about it before they get to see it.
Dan O'Bannon said that his inspiration for the face huggers was that he wanted to scare the men in the audience. With that in mind he decided that the scariest thing for a man was Oral Rape. His words. The face hugger looks a little bit like a vagina on the bottom side as well and the body looks like a set of hands that are choking and suffocating you. And they scamper. Scampering is always scary. Why I don't know, but I think because only small things scamper and small things are are to catch. They are also generally more likely to pierce our skin than simply bludgeon us. No one likes it when their skin has a needle in it, well almost no one.
No one had ever seen anything like the xenomorph and there isn't anything else like it. Even if you kill it chances are it will bleed on you and your face will melt off. All of these are things that are things we don't like, but during this movie we are experiencing them indirectly, through a filter. We don't see someone choking a victim, but we do see hands around a neck.
After all of that imagine that your doctor tries to shove a magazine down your throat and then bleeds milk and marbles.
EVENT HORIZON
Not that great of a movie. It seems almost that the only reason its scary is because it is supposed to be. Too much of the fear is on the surface in special effects and set design and gore. All of it is shock value, which is cheap. I'm not really afraid of hell. I don't want to go there but, it is such a sensory overload that my mind shuts down and tells me it isn't real. Sensory overload is a good way to describe it. Hostel is the same way but there is always a spotlight on what we should focus on, a real tangible horrific act. I don't have anything in my life to relate to Event Horizon's version of Bosch's Hell. ALien keeps thigns in the shadows, doesn't show its hand until we have built up to it. It is a slow churning in the gut rather than a blinding light burning the eyes. Also the acting isn't very good, because there aren't really any well written scenes. Its hard to act well when there is a bad script. Something special has to happen in order for it to be overcome.
And Joely Richardson is the worst. (quick side note just in case you don't believe it, watch her eat something on screen, in Nip/Tuck she eats a piece of steak and a piece of banana bread, she tries way too hard)
2001:A SPACE ODYSSEY / SUNSHINE / MOON
These are interesting because they aren't really horror films, but are still scary. Moon less so. It is a brilliant movie with a huge fear of the unknown and sense of isolation. I also believe it, in terms of it being possible. There is always an impending fear of what is coming, what is going to happen next. And that sense is hard to get so it deserves some mention.
Sunshine is proof that Danny Boyle can direct anything. Space, Zombies, Druggies, Coming of age Journey, A childrens film, Love story. Its nuts. Sunshine turns into a horror film after having been a survival drama. There are tense moments of basic ship repairs and standard space snafus but walking into an abandoned ship covered in dust because, dust is mainly human skin. Reading that in the script is crazy to think about, but Boyle saw it as an opportunity to raise tension and apprehension of what comes next. A man driven crazy by the sun. Literally. After having spliced in some headshots of the ex-crew, ala Friedkin, we finally see what became of them, and a manhunt begins. All while trying to save the world. His tempo and use of angles in his shots as well as light and shadow is eerie. I just wish he had used the focus a little more sometimes towards the end. Also I don't understand why a scalpel would need to vibrate.
2001:A Space Odyssey. See The Shining. Now Imagine that Jack Nicholson was a computer. A computer who is in charge of everything and can control everything around you. Every movie in space owes a lot to Kubrick. Slow steady build in a cold sterile environment. It is a big investment to sit down and watch and might be better without the vague beginning and end. Once you know what is going on it makes sense but the story telling of something based in science should be a tad clearer.
All three of these are great films and have some major horror elements to them but they just don't have enough to beat monsters.
PANDORUM
The trailer and the poster for this film were good and lead to me to approach it in a certain way. The first 20 to 30 minutes of it held up to that agreement. You will put me on a spaceship and weird creepy shti will happen and it will be scary. Ben Foster wakes up from hyper sleep, for his four year shift of running the ship. His body as shrunk and skin has died, he literally no longer fits in his skin and has to shed. Tubes and cables are going in and out of him, he finds another survivor they have no memory and have to figure it out. Then there are some weird noises. It is creepy. Tight spaces, at one point it looks like he will be stuck in a duct forever when he finally gets out it looks like the ship is giving birth to him. At this point The pacing was perfect the suspense was right where it should have been, I knew a reveal was coming up and was all ready to sit back and enjoy the modern day Alien.
That is when everything got stupid. Post apocalyptic tribal mutant cannibals start attacking. Some French Samoan is awesome at Jedi Gymnastics and some Milla Jovovich wannabe is there to. Some convoluted flashbacks and a silly twist happen after they find the reason for the mutation and then something cool happens. Sincerely, its cool. Remember that these guys were floating adrift unsure of where they were, yada yada, generic space plot? They were underwater the whole time. In looking out the window it looked dark because it was deep. They had already reached their destination and were just sitting in the water thinking that Will Robinson is in danger.It was an interesting way to guarantee a happy ending and add to the notion that it is scary not to know where you are even if it is where you are supposed to be.
THE THING
Not in space, but is Isolated and has an Alien. Normally I would say this is a monster movie but the isolation and the simple fact that you don't ever know who might kill you trumps it. Kurt Russell is the shit, always. Its a simple plot, but something about it, i think its unpredictability again, is scary. This monster never looks the same so you never know what part of it might have a mouth to eat you. There is no escape in the antarctic, and rather than black everywhere its white. I don't have much else to say about that.
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